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love and the Nice Guy

So after taking a dating hiatus for a few months, I went on my first date in awhile this week. I was really excited about it because Construction Man is really nice and was doing all the right things- phone calls, being considerate, not getting out of line, etc. One evening we were on the phone for about an hour, and he asked me if I was up for going to see a movie (The Conjuring) that night. I was feeling a little spontaneous, so I put on some clothes and headed out the door.

I was pretty excited to finally meet him. So, I pull up to the theater and waited for him to arrive. I saw him before he saw me, and I have to admit, I was a little less than thrilled. The man works in construction, so I’m not quite sure what I expected- no shade. The man has this long surfer-man hair that everyone out here on the coast sports, and was pretty sloppily dressed. We go in the theater and the man is talking throughout the movie and even whipped out his cell phone at one point. Also, I’m not sure if this is just me being an asshole, but I was also turned off by him ordering a large coke and drinking it all in 20 minutes. To me, the combination of the above shows a lack of care in regards to how you look and to your health. I was unimpressed, to say the least.

BUT HE’S NICE and he likes me. And I’m just struggling with why it seems like all the nice guys just aren’t for me. This isn’t the first “nice guy” that I’ve gone out on a date with, just to realize that I am un-attracted for whatever reason. I know that this isn’t necessarily my fault, but Jesus.

At what point do you stop being attracted to/wanting the cute ones who have nothing to offer and go for the ones that don’t make your panties wet, but are going to treat you how you should be treated? Does the attraction grow? Do you learn to love the things that you see in them, and forget about the rest?

I’m going to test that theory. lol. I’m not ready to just give up on him because he doesn’t excite me and I’m willing to give him a second chance, because maybe I’m being too judgmental. But am I being honest with myself? Granted, just because he’s nice, I already know that he doesn’t have a lot of the qualities that I look for in a man. I’m just wondering if my standards are unrealistic…

I got home and told Kat that I really, really want a man in a suit. Someone who can hold a conversation, went to college, dresses nicely, treats me the way I should be treated AND attractive. I know that that’s out there, I’m praying that it’s out there for me, and I’m not ready to settle for less than what I want just yet. But maybe I should?

At what point do you settle for the things you want in a man, but let the rest go?Should you never settle? I mean, really never settle. Is that realistic? Is there truly someone for everyone? I’ll let you know.

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Posted by on August 18, 2013 in Uncategorized

 

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